Category Archives: roadhogs

The Weekend’s Pictures

Saturday at the Spur… for a birthday party… honestly- its not the most awesome place to go if your kids are older than 8!

My darling Damien… a.k.a. “The Knucklehead”.
This is a 550 Maranello! Spotted at a shopping centre in Randburg…

A Rock & Roll Mickey D’s?!!?!

Not only on a golf cart- in traffic- but on the phone too!!

A rather loud Egyptian Goose- inside Brightwater Commons mall…

This weekends cupcakes!!!

My two men have several common interests- Warhammer 40K is the newest one they share! Here they are building and painting together…

How To Be A South African Road Hog – Lesson # 7

This is how you handle motorcyclists on South African roads!
See, motorcyclists have it easy here in good ol’ SA. They’re allowed to ride in between the traffic lanes and in so doing pass the slower moving cars. And in moving between the cars they get ahead! It’s just so not fair… right?
So when you see one coming in your rear view mirrors- instead of moving ever so slightly to let him pass- move to the right and frustrate him. If you’re approaching a traffic light, stay as far over to the right as possible so they can’t get next to you. If there’s already a bike at the traffic light, pull up next to him so you’re all but touching his handlebars. That’ll make him good and nervous.If you do treat the motorcyclists this way- just don’t be surprised if you lose side mirror after side mirror after side mirror… “accidentally”, on the highway.

How To Be A South African Road Hog- Lesson # 6

Plead ignorance… and if you drive in South Africa then I’m sure you’ve come across this more than once.
This is probably the easiest way to get away with roadhogging.
And its amazingly simple- what it boils down to, is simply not looking at the person you just hogged. This is achieved by pretending you have a blind spot the size of a basketball in ALL your mirrors at the same time.

NB: An advanced technique is combining this with lesson #4- the wave- if you do happen to glance at the person and accidentally catch their eye.

How To Be A South African Road Hog- Lesson # 4

This one is possibly the easiest lesson of the lot… a “wave”.
No- not a Mexican wave- or even a royal wave- just a regular wave. Its surprisingly simple, in this country, a wave makes everything A-O-K… everyone from bus drivers and taxi drivers to regular motorists and cyclists use the wave when they… well lets just say you can do what you like as long as you wave at the person you just offended.

This Takes The Biscuit!

Obviously my reputation is spreading.
This guy (or girl) really went out of his (or her) way to earn himself (or herself) a place on my photoblog, so I’m going to go ahead and crown him (or her):
Supreme Roadhog Twerp Of The Month
How could I not after this person so deliberately parked in the middle of an entrance exit aisle in Jo’Burg International’s parkade.